Sunday, November 28, 2010

The Power: Knowing Facebook is "The Cocktail Party You Are Not Invited To"

I used to LOVE Facebook for The Weatherman.  Being a kid "on the spectrum" means a lot of time alone and for a couple of years, I thought Facebook gave him the cultural references he needed to be on common ground with his otherwise typical peers.  He felt extremely cool as he navigated the silly "Why do Chicks Love You" questionairres and other goofy "groups" that made the isolated kids in the world feel like they were part of something.   I was relieved for him!

But somehow someone had thrown Kryptonite my way and my trusty Parental SUPERvision was disabled!  What was I thinking!  I used to make The Smarter Spicoli and his sister Rainbow Sparkle-Dazzle "get off the Facebook cocktail party!"  I would freak out when they were trying to do "homework" and Facebook was always on their screens when I would walk in their room.  (Parental SUPERvision power...catlike tiptoeing into any given room, undetected)

When we were kids it was easy to sit in your room and wring your hands over what you might be missing in the hormone-filled world of high school.  Can you imagine how much it stinks to be in your room all alone, turn on Facebook and see all the kids who are having fun, attending parties that you are not invited too, hooking up with all the kids you wanted to be hooking up with? What a nightmare! What a mind melt.  Any teenager worth their salt would have a tough time publically viewing all the stuff they are not included in!

How did I not see that coming for The Weatherman?

As The Weatherman wandered through his awkward adolecence armed with primo UCLA social skills our heartbreak for him was withering as we watched him flounder with his typical peers.  The Weatherman was doing EVERYTHING he learned at UCLA, to approach a desirable peer group (hummm), figuring out the desirable peer group (of course, The Weatherman was only attracted to the cool kids.)  He was pretty miserable.  

The final nail on our parental coffin was when we discovered that he was BEGGING on Facebook for anyone to come over to our house to hang out with him because he was so lonely.

Even one came over.

So, Facebook, "The Cocktail Party That You're Not Invited To" and I are in a SUPER Power struggle.

I HATE FACEBOOK!  Kids can say ANYthing to anyone and worst of all, they can publically "un-friend" anyone!  That is social torture!

Could I get arrested if I created a Facebook persona of the Weatherman, surrounded by hot girls, attending amazingly fun events, with tons of people responding to his funny posts so the other kids he knows at school will think he is cool and WANT to be his real and Facebook friend?

It sounds crazy, but think about it, it could be a helluva lot of fun AND it could really work.  In fact, it could be a really great movie....hummm....

Scepters UP!!!


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